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girl friend problems pleaz help
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* February 14, 2004, 05:52:01 PM
­­Fez
hey every1 im new to this site and im 15 goin on 25 im very mature for my age and i have a girlfriend who is very immature we have known each other for 2 years and have been dating for 3 months now. for like the past 2 months she has been saying i love u and i would say it back b/c i really felt taht way with her but it turns out i love you to her really means "i like u" and this entire time i have liked her more then she likes me, and she thinks we are way to different to b dating and it is bugging her, she has been thinkin of breaking up wiht me but i dnt want to b/c i still like her i dnt kno wat to do i have been thinkin about breaking up with her so i wont b as hurt when she dumps me but im lost please send me some advice i really could use the help. if u want u can email me with ur advice at

...<snip - admin: Email removed for spammer protection. This user can be reached through their contact form by clicking on their username>­

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February 23, 2004, 09:15:12 PM
#1
­ Fez:

I am so sorry about your situation. I tried to write you back at the email address you gave at the bottom of your letter but it came back as not a valid email address so I am posting your answer on the forum. I hope this is OK. I wanted you to have some help.

OK, now to your situation. Your situation is one of the hardest to give any real hopeful options, because it is pretty black and white. You can not make someone love you. I don’t know why she would use the words if she didn’t mean them but then all relationships are risks and we all get hurt. The most important thing to focus on is to remember we all get hurt and we all get over our hurts, life will go on and you will meet other girls and someday there will be a Ms. Right. That doesn’t help your broken heart now. What I want you to try to do is not close off to love and realize that everyone gets hurt and everyone does recover, moves on and falls in love again. Just know and realize that “this too shall pass” is so true. As far as what to do. I would sit down and just have an honest talk with her and make a decision right then and there. Either she loves you and wants to continue or she doesn’t and if she doesn’t end it. It is worse to go on and linger on when you know the end is coming, that only makes it hurt worse. It is better to get it over with and start the healing process ya know what I mean? That is what I would do and if she won’t give you a straight answer then I would take in upon myself to care enough about myself and protect myself from any further pain and end it. I mean you deserve the truth and a straight answer that is only fair. If she won’t give you one then you have to do what is best for you and that is to get out because she obviously doesn’t love you or she wouldn’t hurt you like she is, playing with words and being so “iffy” that isn’t caring about you or the relationship. You are just going through what everyone goes through love and the loss of love. Also remember that if it was right it would have lasted so she definitely isn’t your great love in life. When it is the real thing you will both love each other and nothing can come between you. You won’t have to worry, or go through pain. You will both treat each other with love and it will last. That is one good thing about love if it is right it takes care of itself so to fight to keep a relationship that isn’t working or both people don’t feel the same way about each other is useless no matter what. It won’t ever work, you can make it linger on maybe but it won’t ever work. So let it go and know that she isn’t the right girl for you or this would not have happened. Have faith in love Fez when it is right you will know it and the girl will feel the exact same way and it will work, no fears, no doubts.
Good luck and I hope you get out and open your heart so the right girl can come along and take that space in your heart where you need to be loved.
MaryAnne

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