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Girl likes guy who is just a friend now
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December 18, 2001, 10:03:14 AM
­ Dear MaryAnne,
hey. my name is stacy and i need some advice please. i have an ex boyfriend who i like so much and i cant get over them and he trys to still talk to me online but tonight i just now am starting to talk to him again. i miss him so much and he doesnt act like he cares that much. all i want is to be with him again and make everything work. i dont know what to do. i have been depressed and i have been thinking about this a while now and i dont know what to do or who to ask so could u please help me? thank u so much!

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December 18, 2001, 10:04:00 AM
#1
­ Stacy:

Gee I don’t know I know it hurts and that it is really hard to get it through to your heart that this guy may just not like you anymore in the way you want him to. In your teens both sexes are fickle and feelings change like the weather. If he acts like he doesn’t care then he probably doesn’t and no matter what you want will change that feeling in him. There is reality and then there is reality. You may want him and to make everything the way it was or the way you want it to be but then there is “reality” where he has his rights and feelings too. And no matter what you may want it won’t be because he has the same rights as you do and that is to not care for you in a romantic way. Maybe he does still like you but is afraid right now. You say he still tries to talk to you on line, maybe he wants to find out if there is anything left between you but doesn’t know how. So at this point we really don’t know how this guy feels do we?
OK, then lets find out, you have to be somewhat “available” but not too much where he feels that you are available and at his disposal. He also can’t know that you are just sitting around crying over him or you will never get him back. If you act like you want him and need him too much that will just make him run the other way or use you. You are worth more than that. Remember you are worth a lot and he needs to pursue you. It is “nature” that the prize is chased by the guy and even though things “look” like they have changed they haven’t since the beginning of time and the animal kingdom proves that all things have stayed the same. If you are worth anything the guy comes after you. So, be on line and talk to him and even private it you can with him and just ask him how he is doing and if he misses you at all? Just cuz you ask him a question doesn’t mean you have to answer the question, play that a little mysterious OK? Tell him you miss him if he were around for you to miss. Make it so he can take it two ways. But give him a way to get back in and tell you how he feels so he feels safe if he did say he wanted to get back together. Let him know you are making it ok without him but that you could also make it good with him in your life. Give just a little away to show him you like him still but not enough so that you scare him to run the other way.
Try and see what happens, just don’t throw yourself at him or make yourself too available guys or girls don’t like that. It gets to you after a while even if you like the person, ya know?
Let me know what happens or if you want to deal with this some more,
Good luck Stacy,
MaryAnne

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Where you know you can come for Professional, personal, right on target advice, life skills, crisis intervention,ask questions, confide in guaranteed help. With all the traps, scams, perverts and sites out there that are very unsafe, this site is your safe place. I have been doing this for 10 years.