­ Thank you for the advice,

I was able to message her a few times last night explaining that I had no idea what she was talking about and that I had never said any horrible things about her. She said she believed me and is cool with it.

But now I feel as if I have lost a little bit of respect for her, because she didn't come to me with these problems to begin with, choosing to believe others who she does not know as well.

The last few weeks, she has been too busy or tired to see me, and I know she also works full time during the week so I have been very understanding and patient of that fact. But I can't help think of the possibility that these could be "excuses" because she is not interested anymore. Do you think I should sit down with her and go over what we both want from each other? Or any other idea's that could help?

I feel as if I act too eager at times, and that she has the "initiative" or "power" in the relationship. Is this a good or bad thing? do I need this power? If so, how do I go about getting it? I don't know if she respects me.

Thank you once again,
Robert Szatkowski

­ Robert:

I think that is a very good idea. Anytime things get confusing and two people are no longer communicating and what I mean by communicating is where both people put effort into hearing and understanding what the other is saying and meaning. You two are clearly not doing that. I would ask her out go somewhere quiet and talk. Get it straight between you what you feel for each other, what each of you wants out of the relationship and where you go from here. I would also tell her that you feel a little hurt that she did not come to you first about the rumors as we all know things like that go around all the time and that you should go to the person before you believe a rumor. But I mostly would sit down and have this talk because something inside of you is telling you that something is not right and from experience I know that voice never lies. That is your inner voice and it is telling you something is not right so go with it you can't lose. I mean if you have anything between you she will respect you for wanting to talk things out and get them straight. Otherwise I think you are just going to be jacked around. You call her she will or will not say yes with some excuse and then you are left guessing what is up. That will get old fast so I would get together for just a couple of hours this week if she can't spare that to talk to you then you have your answer already. People who have it for each other all act the same and one of those actions is they find the time to be together if there is interest so something is up find out what it is.
You are thinking very mature, very straight and also very fair so go for it and let me know what happens.
MaryAnne

­ Thankyou, I'll let you know how it pans out.

It's hard to get in contact with her, I have to revert to text messaging on my mobile phone, which I hate because it's so impersonal.

I feel as if I act too eager at times, and that she has the "initiative" or "power" in the relationship. Is this a good or bad thing? do I need this power? If so, how do I go about getting it? I don't know if she respects me.