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Need Help with my Brother
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October 09, 2001, 10:48:07 PM
­ Dear MaryAnne,

I need some guidance. My brother is temporarily staying at my house. My husband and I agreed to help him out... He had gotten kicked out of a house he had been renting for several years. He had no where to go. He doesn't have a relationship with anyone in my family. We agreed to let him stay at our house for a couple weeks. He's been here two weeks, during that time he got a job waiting on tables. I hope that he keeps this job. He needs to make enough money so he can get a place of his own. I'm deeply concerned that he won't be able to do that. He's very depressed. He needs professional help. But doesn't have insurance. I'm concerned that our efforts to help him will turn into a big fiasco. We can only help him out through the end of October.

T

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October 09, 2001, 10:50:11 PM
#1
­ Dear T:

You are in a difficult position and I feel for you. Here is your brother and yet you have to be dedicated to your husband.
You didn’t give me too much information. Like why your brother got kicked out of where he is living, why he had no money? Unless he is a teenager there is a lot more going on with him to cause all these variables. I assume you are choosing not to tell me about these variables. Also, why he has no relationship with anyone else I the family and why he can only work as a waiter?
But, you have chosen not to share this information. Please realize this impedes my ability to answer you with my knowledge base OK?
All I can really help you with is the question that you made clear to me, that he is depressed and needs help, yet has no insurance do I have it right?
And then if he stays, where will he live, because you do not believe the day will come in October, which is as long as you feel that you and your husband can afford to financially help your brother.
So with what you gave me I can tell you he can receive help without financial resources. I don’t know where you live but every County has a mental health center. Say you live in Johnson County, just look up in your phone book where the County, City and State numbers are. Look under County and usually health and there will be a Johnson County Mental Health Center. They see everyone and usually at no cost or at a cost the person can afford. If you go say your brother is “staying” with you and not just a visitor otherwise they will tell him to go where to the County Mental Health Center where he lives. The County Mental Health Center can also refer him to the agencies that can help him find a place to live until he can get on his feet. The system has plenty of resources you just have to tap into them. He may not live what they offer but for no cost you can’t be too choosy. But they will get him Psychiatric help, medications, help finding a place to live and meals that is pretty good. And that way you wouldn’t have to feel obligated or guilty because at all these centers the people are very dedicated and work hard for indigent people. They truly want to see these people get on their feet and make it again in life. Also all Emergency Rooms have to see mental health patients and do an assessment for free usually. I use to do them for the Emergency Rooms where I live at no cost to the patient. They also always have a Psychiatrist “on call” and he is obligated if he is called by the ER to see a Psychiatric patient, to come in and see the person. At least he would be seen, and if you go to a University hospital ER they also can call down one of the Social Workers whose job is to help find people like your brother the mental help they need and help with housing and employment if needed. This gives you two routes to go.
I hope you are able to talk him into going and getting the help he needs. He has to get his depression under control before he will be able to make the rest of his life work for him.
Remember both of these resources I gave you have to see him that is why I am telling you how the system works so use them and get what you need for your brother.
I hope I have helped, please let me know what happens and how it all works out,
God Bless you all,
MaryAnne

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Where you know you can come for Professional, personal, right on target advice, life skills, crisis intervention,ask questions, confide in guaranteed help. With all the traps, scams, perverts and sites out there that are very unsafe, this site is your safe place. I have been doing this for 10 years.